I can sit and stare at you while you sleep and want to hold you. Take in your smell and just be with you. Listen to you breathe and hear your heart beating just to know you are really here growing and becoming little people. When you are awake I see you learn, grow, laugh and play and my heart skips a beat but why do I feel like I need to be a better parent, be more patient? I don’t know why I feel like I’m not fulfilling my motherly duty. I love you more than words can ever say. You have all of me. I’d give my every last breath to you and my world is yours, then why this feeling? 

Some days are good, some days are ok, some days have you walking on cloud nine, and some days make you feel like your insides are crumbling slowly and each break hurts so much you can’t breathe. This is when you have to remember the days that warm your heart and help keep that smile on your face. No matter what the weight is it is up to you to push it off and let it lift way up high. It will find it’s way to someone who will help you breathe again and give you hope that tomorrow will only get better. All you need is faith.

Sometimes you just want to close your eyes tightly breathe in deeply and slowly release it with all the aches, pains, sadness and hurt of all those you love and know so that they too can breathe freely with hope in their heart and faith in their soul and know that tomorrow will be a new day. A day filled with all new beginnings. Please let the weight lift.

Sometimes food just makes all the difference you need at that moment. My handsome love of a man made the most amazing Texas chili. It was all the heart, love and comfort I needed to embrace me tonight. It’s the little things that makes all the difference in the world. Now if only the migraine I had all day would totally make it’s departure it would complete the evening the way it was meant to be.

We all go through many experiences in our lives. Some can make you skip endlessly with smiles and giggles others can have your heart dragging on the floor from the weight and pain that is too heavy for your small hands to lift and hold. There are many different feelings in between but it’s up to you to find those moments that have you skipping and hold on to those tightly so they can help you fly through all the rest. I love to share my thoughts when my heart allows me to put them into words. I want each of you to know that sometimes when someone is smiling so brightly it doesn’t always mean they have no care in the world. It just means that they are trying to be strong not only for those around them but for themselves. Respect those you love, let them know how much they mean to you every chance you get. Never wish for someones life because of the way they look on the outside. You’d be surprised how much better your life is and how beautiful you are. I love my life struggles and bubbles because it’s mine. It’s the life that God has made for me. I just need to leave those scary moments in his hands and share the happiness and love with him because I know that he is there through it all. Sometimes you just need little reminders.  

Eating lunch at a German spot with an unbelievably handsome man. I can’t help but stare admiringly into those beautiful eyes and enjoy the view in front of me. The room is filled with smells of cinnamon and the sounds of the wood crackling in the fireplace. The warmth fills the air as The Five Stairsteps play in the background of a familiar tune…Ooh Child things are gonna get easier…Makes you feel the love, hope and faith all around us.

You made me smile, laugh, cry, skip, worry, stop and think and then run like hell but we did it together 2012! Here’s to the end of a year and the start of a new. May this year be filled with love so strong it takes your breath away, joy and laughter that makes your finger tips and toes tingle, faith that keeps your soul lifted and hope that makes you fly. Hoping 2013 brings GOOD health to all my family and friends and may your home always be filled with family and friends that carry you to each New Year good or bad. Thank you to all of you who have helped, inspired, accepted and loved my family and I. Be safe out there!!!

There is something so peaceful and serene about Christmas tree lights that immediately brings calmness all around you. You can feel the warmth from the tree surround you and all you can do is sit and stare at the beautiful lights shining back at you. It’s moments like these when you feel thankful for all the things in your life, big or small and appreciate the journey that brought you where you are today. I still can’t believe that God blessed me with two beautiful babies. Two remarkable, kind-hearted soon to be two year olds. God’s faith in me showers me with love everyday and keeps me strong to continue to be the best mother I can be. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. I do love my family, my life and my friends. It’s been an amazing journey and I can’t wait to continue along with all of you. Thank you for being a part of my everyday!

This is for a few very special people in my life. You just keep being you, love yourself, your family, your life and enjoy each moment as it was your last. Never let the greed, jealousy, unhappiness and ignorance of others come between making your day the best it can be. Keep on believing in what God has in store for you. We are all working our journey through his eyes. Each day is a gift, open it up with happiness and joy and open arms to accept all that it has to offer, good or bad. Remember you are loved by family and friends everyday mistakes and all.

Waiting outside the church for my parents to come out after a sad mass made me think of all the things in my life that I am grateful for.  As I watched each person leave the church with tears in their eyes and pain in their heart I just sank back in my chair. I turned to my children and thanked God for having them sleeping peacefully right next to me.  It was painful watching them as they slid that tiny coffin in the back of the hearse.  I watched the mother of the 3 year old who lost her battle drop to the floor as family members helped carry her to the limo. It’s times like these when your faith is questioned. Why after all that little girl has gone through, all the suffering, ups and downs, she is called to her Lord?  So many questions and no answers.  All I could do is cry silently as I watched what felt like slow motion of families hugging and crying all around me.  I thanked God again for my children, my husband, my family and all those I hold dear in my life.  I pray and thank God every day for keeping Gio and Isa strong during the toughest time of their lives and bringing them home to our family.  Life is so fragile…appreciate all you have, love with all your heart, laugh so hard a little pee comes out, hug every person in your life as if they were leaving once your arms opened, and give all you have with all your soul and don’t hold back. I love my family and friends and I hope they know that I do.