It’s the first time in a long while that I sat alone in this room. Windows down, wind blowing and kissing me from all angles of the room. Giovanni’s laughter coming through the kitchen window as he plays on the deck. While Isannah sleeps peacefully upstairs. The sounds of The National playing on the radio fills the room and my mind. I can’t help but follow the kids pictures going up the stairs along the exposed brick wall as if experiencing each milestone, each moment for the second time. Each smile, each laughter brings both a calm and fear throughout my body. These two beautiful souls are ours to help grow, live and love. As much as I’m afraid (terrified) I have this hope that we are where we are supposed to be. My mind reflects back to a place on a white sand beach hearing waves crash along the stone, and an image in front of me an image I will never forget. It was Asher lying on a beach chair looking into the ocean with thoughts, I wish I could read but the feeling that mattered at that moment was me falling in love with him. As I stared at him my heart was filling and my body felt whole. A love so strong was planted. As I continue looking at these photos I feel that that moment in Aruba caused all of this to blossom. I sit here with the breeze whipping through the house like the sounds of the ocean waves that day. The day it truly began.