What I read and how I truly feel

“Today I asked my body what she needed,
Which is a big deal
Considering my journey of
Not Really Asking That Much.
I thought she might need more water.
Or protein.
Or greens.
Or sleep.
Or supplements.
Or movement.

But as I stood in the shower
Reflecting on her stretch marks,
Her roundness where I would like flatness,
Her softness where I would like firmness,
All those conditioned wishes
That form a bundle of

She whispered very gently:
Could you just love me like this?”

I read this today and thought how hard that really is. It’s so easy to love others from your children, husband, family, and friends. It’s easier to give advice to those you truly love and give it freely when they need it most but when it comes to yourself.
Well, that seems the hardest.

Why is it that the amazing helpful advice you give others doesn’t apply to you when it should?

How is it so hard to look at yourself and smile most of the times?

I always wish that my children and those I truly love could see themselves through my eyes because then they would know how truly beautiful and special they are. But when I look at myself with those same eyes I don’t see that worth or that light.

Sometimes it just all hurts and it’s hard even when the people around you bring so much love and hope into your life.

Just me thinking about loud.