When you have kids they say you make new friends. You bring your kids to different activities, classes, events and school so you begin to see the same faces. Parents dropping off their kids or enjoying a class together. You exchange smiles and pleasantries but then a lot of the time it stops there. It takes a lot for me to open myself up and let anyone in but you try to do just that. Sometimes it works and sometimes it makes you shrivel up and close the door even tighter.
Moving is hard no matter where you started or where you came from. My home to me will always be Brooklyn. That is where I was born and celebrated my younger years. I also made some of my closest friends during that time. Although we moved away early on my heart has always been here. Now that doesn’t mean that during my travels I haven’t met amazing friends, I surely have. It just means my feet always want to land here. A move is hard especially for a person that is shy and doesn’t put themselves out there. I always thought, Why should I? When you are hurt a number of times your door closes tighter and your confidence all but diminishes. It takes a lot to undo what was done.
This morning as I was taking my kids to school I saw familiar faces so I smiled at each face. It was hard for me because my mind was feeling a little heavy this morning but that didn’t stop me from trying. I found that not everyone wants a smile in the morning. It almost felt as though I was bothering some and that made it harder for me to keep my smile. Once I dropped off the kids my mind drifted to my time in Texas. I realized that as much as I wanted to leave there I miss it. Well, let me rephrase that. I miss the friends I made there. I wish there was a way you could gather them all up and take them wherever you go. I mean, I know I do just that in memories and in my heart but I miss the physical being. That being said, I tried to open up myself again to people around me. I convinced myself that not everyone is out to hurt you or to hurt people. You need to open yourself up to the world so that you can receive amazing gifts.
I met a couple of new parents within the past few days that are truly kind. I’m happy I didn’t allow myself to be discouraged once again by the negative. Even though this will be a slow process it’s a stage in your life like everything else. It’s how we allow ourselves to experience it and move forward. Hoping to do that with kind people that will help me grow as well as allow me to help them. It’s great when you share a common goal and for me that is to love unconditionally. Help my children grow up to be the best people they can be. Along with teaching them not to give up, be strong and ALWAYS believe in yourself even when you feel like you lost your way. Surround yourself with people that lift you up and allow you to shine. That love your smile so that no matter how you feel that smile brightens up the day.