Eating lunch at a German spot with an unbelievably handsome man. I can’t help but stare admiringly into those beautiful eyes and enjoy the view in front of me. The room is filled with smells of cinnamon and the sounds of the wood crackling in the fireplace. The warmth fills the air as The Five Stairsteps play in the background of a familiar tune…Ooh Child things are gonna get easier…Makes you feel the love, hope and faith all around us.
You made me smile, laugh, cry, skip, worry, stop and think and then run like hell but we did it together 2012! Here’s to the end of a year and the start of a new. May this year be filled with love so strong it takes your breath away, joy and laughter that makes your finger tips and toes tingle, faith that keeps your soul lifted and hope that makes you fly. Hoping 2013 brings GOOD health to all my family and friends and may your home always be filled with family and friends that carry you to each New Year good or bad. Thank you to all of you who have helped, inspired, accepted and loved my family and I. Be safe out there!!!
There is something so peaceful and serene about Christmas tree lights that immediately brings calmness all around you. You can feel the warmth from the tree surround you and all you can do is sit and stare at the beautiful lights shining back at you. It’s moments like these when you feel thankful for all the things in your life, big or small and appreciate the journey that brought you where you are today. I still can’t believe that God blessed me with two beautiful babies. Two remarkable, kind-hearted soon to be two year olds. God’s faith in me showers me with love everyday and keeps me strong to continue to be the best mother I can be. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. I do love my family, my life and my friends. It’s been an amazing journey and I can’t wait to continue along with all of you. Thank you for being a part of my everyday!
This image will remain in my heart forever. Tonight the music was turned up as Giovanni, Isannah, Asher and I danced throughout the playroom floor. Smiles, laughter and mixed dance moves filled our home. I caught myself smiling so widely as I looked over at Giovanni trying to copy my every dance move while giggling, Asher flaring his arms in the air and Isannah shaking her coolie as she tries to snap her fingers. The happiness on these faces will last a lifetime. I can still hear Giovanni demanding more, more, more each time Asher and I tried to sit down to take a break. It wasn’t happening until they were completely done which was two entire songs later. Ah, but it was so worth it. I love my family…they are all of me.
This is for a few very special people in my life. You just keep being you, love yourself, your family, your life and enjoy each moment as it was your last. Never let the greed, jealousy, unhappiness and ignorance of others come between making your day the best it can be. Keep on believing in what God has in store for you. We are all working our journey through his eyes. Each day is a gift, open it up with happiness and joy and open arms to accept all that it has to offer, good or bad. Remember you are loved by family and friends everyday mistakes and all.
My babies turned 22 months today. What a way to celebrate. A long car ride nap, a trip to the mall and a triple chocolate meltdown cake with vanilla ice-cream. All I could hear was more, more, mommy, yummy, yummy, MORE, MORE and all I could see was the day I held each of them in the NICU and all I felt was the love that embraced me the first time I was able to kangaroo each of them. What a beautiful journey.
Today I closed the book for the last time. I can’t believe it was my last entry in Gio and Isa’s daily feeding log. I started it when we brought them home and didn’t stop writing in it until today. It was so hard to close knowing I wouldn’t write in it again. I know that may sound silly but it was my security blanket so to speak. The one thing I could control which gave me peace and comfort. The big question was if I was going to start a new journal and continue to log every meal. This is when I took a deep breath and told myself no. They are both doing well, no more wires, machines just two incredibly sweet, loving, adoring, fun, healthy gorgeous babies. It was time for me to close that chapter and continue to enjoy stuffing their mouths with whatever they enjoy and makes them happy;-) We are ok now and I can let go just a little. Let the new chapters begin and fill our lifetime book.
Waiting outside the church for my parents to come out after a sad mass made me think of all the things in my life that I am grateful for. As I watched each person leave the church with tears in their eyes and pain in their heart I just sank back in my chair. I turned to my children and thanked God for having them sleeping peacefully right next to me. It was painful watching them as they slid that tiny coffin in the back of the hearse. I watched the mother of the 3 year old who lost her battle drop to the floor as family members helped carry her to the limo. It’s times like these when your faith is questioned. Why after all that little girl has gone through, all the suffering, ups and downs, she is called to her Lord? So many questions and no answers. All I could do is cry silently as I watched what felt like slow motion of families hugging and crying all around me. I thanked God again for my children, my husband, my family and all those I hold dear in my life. I pray and thank God every day for keeping Gio and Isa strong during the toughest time of their lives and bringing them home to our family. Life is so fragile…appreciate all you have, love with all your heart, laugh so hard a little pee comes out, hug every person in your life as if they were leaving once your arms opened, and give all you have with all your soul and don’t hold back. I love my family and friends and I hope they know that I do.
So we decided to take Gio’s diaper off and run free because of a diaper rash that won’t go away. I head to the kitchen to clean dishes while Asher leaves Gio for 30 seconds to tell me about dinner plans. He goes back in the room and all I hear is a scream followed by my name. I run over to find Asher frantically picking up Gio while Isa is sitting on the floor surrounded by poop. Poop under her feet in her hands and this priceless expression on her face as if she found gold. Well, that was definitely the color. Let’s just say it was an interesting rest of the evening.
After listening to the craziness coming from the back seat of my car I couldn’t help but look through my rear view mirror and laugh uncontrollably. Gio woke up 40 minutes away from our house on the drive back from Monroe, NY and he decided to scream to the Heavens. Mom tried everything to keep him calm. From wearing two pairs of baby sunglasses on her head along with her own seeing glasses to furry things on her head and stickers on her face and hands. She had kids books set up along the seat tops and sound effects for each toy she could possibly hold. Keep in mind all this being done with an Italian BK accent while trying to name things and create stories from the pictures in the kids books since she can’t read all the words well in English. The finisher was the best. She found a small bag pouch which she spoke into while opening and closing it to show that someone was in there talking back to her. I think at that point Gio FINALLY stopped screaming to stare at Nonna to see what the heck was wrong with her. The sounds, cries, laughter and love that filled that car today on the drive home confirmed what an amazing mom I have and what a blessed Nonna Gio and Isa are lucky to have. I adore my mother and every day I adore her even more. She is the definition of pure angelic love and being. I couldn’t have made that drive without her…my life drive without her and I am grateful everyday that I don’t have to.